On My 29th Birthday...

On my 29th Birthday, What that I want to have was not meant to be fulfilled at the moment and the person who I’m in love now was not meant to be mine…..How can I realized that there’s no room for me and I should not asked for things that I would not get from anyone…..may my future and decision leading me to a place which can promise hope and something for me…People can give me ways but its me was the one who in it and now..I’m still confuse with the direction…

Along the way to 29th years
It was not having a great journey along the years which had I passed by….full of challenge and I can swear to god that I had passed all the bad moment in my life….making lots of mistakes and still doing it…until when I would realized I don’t know….I had make trouble for lots of people and being selfish for what I want to achieved…at the end of the day until now…Allah had curse me with all my sins…

At the moment of time…I was lost in my own thinking, act and desire…totally can’t find a direction to go to and was hang out at a place which I do think it was save for the time being….envy with all my friends which had achieved all what they wants in life and also jealous with all the happiness which I can’t ever got in my whole entire life…

Life is short for me but I have fulfilled it with all the saddest thing…I don’t know how to keep it away and change it with the happiest moment…..today, I just being fake with throwing fake smiles to all my friends and hide all the things which keep bothering me at the time being. I just want all my friend happy and when they smile..It makes me happy…

Career
At the moment, being a design Architect teach me on how to be passion but after what had been happen for the pass few months..it makes me demotivate and I’m finding ways to bring back my spirit…I was guilty with all my friends and I promise to cover it back…

I was offered a new job in Abu Dhabi but I’ve rejected it because of certain issues that can’t be clarify by them…furthermore, I feel that I owe something with my Design Director and I would fulfill it before I make any move…It was a great competition between all the Design Architect here and I just want to show my last try until I feel it is the time…….I will go to the unknown destination

Friends
I was thank to Allah for surrounded me with all the good friends which always be there for me and really help when I need…I just being thankful and do hope that Allah would bless all of my friend and give all the happiness…..without them…my life will be empty and worst..

I just know today that one of my friend, Ali Noor Azhar had secretly flying back to Malaysia for good and left my company without tendering the resignation letter, TAK because of certain personal issues…I’ve been told that he couldn’t stand with his boss in site office which generally known by all…It was a nightmares working with him….for Ali Noor Azhar, I would missed you…wish that we can meet again in future..thanks for everything…would bare in mind that you were one of my best friend here in Dubai…

I really don't know what happened in TAK at the moment....from what I heard, 18 peoples had tendered the resignation letter and 2 people went missing...huh....don't know what's going to happen next....

Religion
For the moment of truth, I’m not a pious person and still developing myself to be a goo Muslim, thanks to a brother that keep teaching me the way of Islam and now slowly teaching me to recite Al Quran

Love
I was in love with someone which were not belong to me..it just difficult to throw out the feeling and change its direction….I’m thankful for the love given by my friend but I do wish that I got a love that I dreamt off….but it was just my wish..I just follow the requirement of my heart..until one day…I may realized that I was not meant to get any love that I want..

For those who do love me in any ways you do…thank you for everything..thank you for keep on giving your passion on me and I do appreciate it so much….I want to dedicate my high appreciation for somebody who had love me and sacrifice everything until the limit…I do loving you so much and I hope you also love me…I know that you might not reading my blog or may be you read but keep being a person without heart and keep torturing me..I still in love you…

Maturity
I do think that this is the time teaching me to be more mature and developing my thinking..I do hope people surround me to give moral support and justify to me that there’s still hope to gain the happiness in my life…

Wish
As a human being, I’m also having many wish in my life, I do hope that I can achieve the happiness and living happily ever after….

Appreciation
Thanks for all the Birthday wishes came from all my friends…Dillah Putit from Sarawak was the first one wishing me on my birthday and Mamat, Ali Noor and his mother, Bro Azhan, Harris, Bro Razak, all my friends in XEDL, my Design Director that always there for me and all my friends from all over the world…..Thank you so much…

It was a normal shining day for me, after had my bath and get dressed, I went to take food that I had ordered from Fadzil wife, Siti Fairus….she had cooked for me Pulut kuning with chicken curry…thank you for your service and hospitality…

Siti Fairus and me

She prepare for me Pulut Kuning with chicken curry

After picking up the foods, I went to my office and reached there around 12.50 pm…..after bringing up all the stuff…I went to French Connection to take my birthday cake which I had booked 3 days ago….

I went back to the office and put all the foods at our pantry area…After switch on my pc, I’ve invited all my friends to the pantry and had lunch together…I’m purposely doing it at lunch time because I know at the end of office hour..I would be splash with water and I would get wet….

My 29th birthday cake

Munyra Asyikin, me and Rohaizereen

Umi Kalthom and me

After having lunch with all my officemates, I just continue doing my work until the end of the day..when I want to go back, suddenly Hadi hold my hand and didn't allow me to go back, spontaneous, Yunus and Adrinfard came and splash water on me...and then Hisham Saihari came and put cake on mu face...huh....

I'm wet

After I'm was wet, I just went to the site office pick up my friend and went back home, there still some pulut kuning and chicken curry that I save for dinner....after had my bath, I ate dinner and updating my blogs....it was a new year and new age for me...hope it would be better...

until next post