Friday, November 21, 2008

A thoughtful friday...Global village comes again

As usual, it was friday and it's an off day for me....I'm done lot of thinking today basically on what's happened in the past few days....at the moment of time...I do hope that all of my friends would give me a good advised for me to refer in concluding the way for me to continue...

After I fly back from Malaysia last month....everything was not going on track and I'm keep being hypocrite to myself and pretending to everybody that I'm happy and recover from everything... Obviously, it's getting worst....the one that I loved and hope to give me happiness just pour me his poison everyday....but I just stay calm and hurting myself just because I want to be with him..eventhough some times...I'm just holding a knife and want to stab myself so that I can die and off from the pain of love...

Maybe all my friends and close family members who do read my blog would say that just be calm and take it easy...but I just want to highlight to all of you that it's very difficult for me to do it....I'm always comparing to the other's like me that get what they want in life......a companion to do everything together and be in happy and bad moment of time...and until now...I didn't get what I want...sometimes..I just lose my passion to understand what else that the god want to do to me and my life...

I want to blame the creator that he had create me like this...having this feeling and born in this world just to keep hurting myself ....I do behave that I'm not thankful for what did I got in life....being as a soul that trapped in the wrong body really make me uncomfortable and lose my confident to continue my life....can God just stop my life and bring me out from the pain that I have...only he knows when my life would be taken back..

I'm being in the middle of conflict when I'm trapped in love, I just can't accept that I was failed to get the love and to love....I just think that the only way for me to get out from this was keep running....flying to somewhere else where no one would know me....and find the love that I want...not the love that all of you do ask me to get...because obviouly you were not understand who am I and what I want..

I hope..that someone will come and give his love to me because I'm desperately want's it.

I woke up around 10.40 am and eat breakfast done by my friend...After had my bath, I went to the mosque to perform friday prayer....I don't have mood to do everything and just stay in the room...my friend asked me to go to global village because he want to buy something...if I followed my heart..I don't want to go..but pity to them....I just followed and bring them to the place because just want to make them happy...

We went out from house around 3.20 pm...and reached there around 4.10 pm...we paid AED 10 each person and get to the place...it was a combination of cultural shopping and exhibition from all over the continent....

along our way to Global village through Emirates road

Harris, Bro Janggut and Bro Razak

at the entrance

We went to the first pavillion, Yemen when I introduced to all the brother that the honey from this pavillion was a must to buy....

all of them selecting the honey and taste

at the knife shop.....prepared to kill myself later

Harris pose at the Paris wheel

my pose

I just left them behind and find myself food to eat...they have their own purpose to come here and my purpose was finding a good foods.

strawberry with chocolate

All of the brother was hardly wanted to buy the leather jacket...I just bring them to the Pakistan pavillion and they just find what they wants..

inside the leather jacket shop


Harris with his new jacket and cap

Bj and Razak with their new jacket too

and again...I just stop for foods....crazy...while walking with them...I just miss someone that I love and really want him to be with me...unfortunately....again, he broke my heart and I just keep hurting myself...I hate this feeling

at Pizza hut

We continue walking around and snap photos....the photo below was taken at Syria pavilion..

photo of me

Harris

Harris, Bro Janggut and Razak

Bj and Razak with the tea man

We went to Thailand pavillion and get our dinner there...just hoping that we can find a foods that can cure for missing Malaysian foods...

in fornt of Thai Muslim cuisine

I'm ordered seafood fried rice

lantern in all around the village

I was amazed with one of the street artist that drawing human face in less than 10 minutes... just paid AED 50 and I asked him to draw my face...

self potrait in the making

this is what he drawn......does it look like my face?? you judge...

view at night..

After spending more than 3 hours at the place, we went back home and reached house around 8.30 pm...after had my bath and updating my blog....I watch James Bond movie..Tomorrow never Dies...and sleep around 12.00 midnight...

Always hope that tomorrow will give me some hope..but God just envy with me and he would torturing me more for the next days I'm still alive...

until next post



2 comments:

tini said...

Don’t envy others’ life. Grass always looks greener on the other side. You feel unlucky, but I’m sure lots of your friends envy with what you have now. Loves not always come at a time you need it but do not be miserable. You choose your own life, how to lead it, whether you want to be happy or sad. I’m sure you are a strong person otherwise you won’t survive living in Dubai, faraway from family and frens. So be strong, be happy, you only young once, so live life to the fullest.

Kakak Tiri said...
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